By Belinda Reilly
I remember vividly the concerns about whether or not my children would be in the same classroom as they entered the school system for the first time.
I’ve been incredibly lucky and both primary schools that my children have attended (Victoria and Queensland) have been accommodating when it came to this question.
My personal belief was that the decision should be made by the parents in conjunction with the school and the children.
I knew that one of my twins was a little more dependent on the other and that separation for him would be more of a struggle. We made a request to the school as the children entered prep, that the children stay together and at each parent/teacher interview we were careful to discuss this with the teacher to ensure there were no issues in the classroom.
The children moved schools in about Grade 2 and my first question of their new primary school was whether or not we could have any influence over whether the children stayed together or were separated. I received a lovely email from the principal saying that she had experience in this area via friends and students and believed that each set of multiples was different and their individual needs should be catered for. It was such a relief.
Consequently my children have stayed together throughout primary school. By their own choice they have different friends and usually don’t sit or work directly together in class, but will face the challenge of high school soon and the much stronger possibility of separation. I think they are definitely ready for that, although it will be an adjustment for all of us.
As we head toward International Multiple Birth Awareness Week (November 4-11), the theme will be “School placement of multiples, and issues regarding whether separation or not is best”.
The International Council of Multiple Birth Organizations (ICOMBO) promotes awareness of the unique needs of multiple-birth infants, children, and adults. ICOMBO is the lead organiser of International Multiple Birth Awareness Week (IMBAW). This event is held bi-annually during the first week of November.
The Australian Multiple Birth Association (AMBA) is a not-for-profit organisation assisting multiple birth families. The organisation provides support, resources and education to multiple birth families from “those who know”.
Ali Mountifield, Communications Director of AMBA is a mother of five-year old triplets. Her children started preschool this year.
“We’ve kept them together this year, it was quite a process to make the decision but we don’t regret it, they are independent and social children, so that keeping them together was a balance for us as a family, with the benefit of only one classroom drop-off and one teacher,” Ali said.
“It was a three-way decision with the children, teacher/school and parents making a decision; we were always open to separating them during the year if it wasn’t working.”
AMBA and ICOMBO advise parents to turn their minds to schooling as their multiples come out of the baby years.
As multiples reach school age, families need to think about putting their children into the same class or separating them, the dependency of the multiples on one another and how they’d cope if they were separated. The opposite of that is whether they need the space to express their individuality or to not be ruled by a dominant sibling. There is no right or wrong answer, the decision needs to be made on a case-by-case basis and it depends on the children, the family unit and the options available at the school.
Truth About Twins 