The chubby baby smiles are coming thick and fast, but unfortunately the lack of sleep is reaching epic proportions.
It not uncommon for the missing cornflake packet to be found in the walk-in-robe and to find yourself washing your hair with the foaming facial cleanser.
Everyone said, ‘At three months it will be fine. Just get to the three month mark and the babies will take a leap forward and be much happier and easier to handle.’
The three month mark comes, and goes. Where’s your improvement you ask?
Wondering if there is something dreadfully wrong with your children you visit your GP and are referred to a sleep clinic.
You picture a place full of king-sized beds and fluffy white doonas where you can sink into peaceful oblivion while someone else gets up six times a night to care for your children. Think again.
These are military training camps for kids. They are also potential saviours of your sanity.
Teaching a firm, but kind approach to sleep training your babies, you are given hands on training in the right techniques.
It takes time, but it works. After six nights sleeping on the nursery floor on a three-inch single bed mattress, you reach Xanadu. That magical place where your babies take a 10.30pm bottle and generally sleep a solid six hours.
It’s time to tackle your first mothers group. You pack a nappy bag with every conceivable item and wonder how you are going to feed both babies at once without your pram/lounge/bottle/dummy combination. Still, it’s time to try.
It takes one hour to pack and get the babies ready and you have the trip timed like clockwork.
You walk into a room full of women with singletons, vaguely jealous that they are able to kick back and relax with a coffee while baby lies happily at their feet on a bunny rug.
You set up in a corner – one extra large throw rug, two babies, two bottles, two dummies, and some toys.
You sit cross legged on the floor dreading the moment when you will have to feed the boys.
The wimpering starts (them, not you) and you realise you’ll have to prepare the formula and attempt your first bottle feed in public.
The crowd begins to gather as you manipulate the babies into position. The gasps of admiration go up as the group watches you balance two babies and two bottles at once.
You can feel the awe. An hour later you leave your first mother’s group feeling justifiably proud.
So enamored with your own success, you even consider buying one of those t-shirts. Y’know those ones you buy from on the internet with slogans like, ‘You can’t scare me, I’ve got twins’.
You visit Baby Target and make the most of the baby room facilities to feed the boys their bottles.
Another couple watch and then lean over to admire the boys. ‘Are they twins?’ the woman asks politely. ‘No, they’re quads. But these two are our favourites so we left the other two at home,’ you hear DH mutter under his breath.
You dive in quickly to recover the situation and confirm that they are in fact twins. ‘Were you on drugs?’ the woman asks. You know you can’t stop DH this time.
DH looks the woman in the eye and answers, ‘We weren’t then, but we sure are now’. Taken aback, she smiles wanly and leaves. You both roll on the floor chuckling.
Related Content
Raising Twins – Months 1-3
Raising Twins – Months 3-6
Raising Twins – Months 6-9
Raising Twins – Months 9-12
Truth About Twins 